Warning: Top May Blow Off

This blog is v. blog-y. I post sporadically, am sporadically funny, and am most likely funny only when I'm not trying to be. So, be forewarned, and thanks for reading!


Tuesday, November 16, 2004

star jones is a crazy bitch

okay, so i was half-watching "the view" this morning, and they were still talking about star jones' freakin' wedding, and from what they were saying, i came to several unsettling, but probably accurate, conclusions:

1. star's wedding ring could be seen from outer space, which, if she were someone i loved, i would say was awesome, but since i most definitely don' t love her, i will say is showy and pretentious.

2. there was a very long list of rules for attending this wedding. like it was boot camp or something!

3. it was apparently "against the rules" for joy behar to wear pants to the wedding (um, excuse me, but are we in the 19...some decade when women couldn't wear pants?!?). but this was not actually a punishable offense, which leads me to...

4. it was strictly "against the rules" to bring a camera to the wedding or reception. however, joy, who i liked very much for breaking bridezilla's rules, snuck a camera in anyway, and then had star pose for a picture! ha!! and then, crazy star jones actually wrestled the camera out of joy's hot little hands. based on what i heard this morning, star jones had pummelled it into everyone's heads that cameras were absolutely forbidden, not even her family, or anyone could have a camera, and this offense, my friends, unlike wearing pants (oh, the horror) , actual made star say that she "wanted blood from the veins". Um, what????????

5. after the whole pants et camera fiasco, star seemed to imply that joy would be punished by not being invited to "the next thing". Oh my god! the woman's a power-hungry control-freak, and is also going to have another wedding!??? shoot me now.

alright, i'm done feeding the beast...carry on!


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